I have had a couple hard days trying to process all of this that is going on in our world right now.  The virus, the quarantines, the economy.  Trying to figure out what is appropriate for me and my family. Trying to stay healthy because I am scared to death to be carrying this virus and unknowingly infect a mom or baby at work.  Dealing with a selfish child who can’t see beyond herself and tells us we can’t keep her in lock down in our home.  And then to top it off my husband’s company is laying people off today I’m thanking God that he is and has been their number one sales rep so they are keeping him on but with a 10% pay cut.  So much stress and a husband who is stressed, and he’s always been the strong one.  And our older daughter in tears because she has to move home tomorrow and leave all her “people”.  I keep trying to be the strong one and telling everyone to keep it all in perspective but yet I still feel the anxiety and the fear and am so tearful the last couple days.

And then....I go to the mailbox and God, in his goodness, has placed a check in there.  One that we weren’t expecting.  From a settlement due to fraudulent activity that had scammed us out of that money more than 10 years ago.  This is not the first time, nor the last, that God has provided in such a tangible way for us.  What a reminder of his love and kindness and goodness toward us when we felt it all unraveling.  

So, I weep as I write this.  For all the hard that we all are going through.  For all the goodness of God.  And I am so humbled and full of gratitude to him for reminding me of who He is, just when I need it most, when I have started down that spiral of not trusting.

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